What If You’re Tired of Weddings (But Still Love the Work)?

Photo by Vasilis Caravitis on Unsplash

“I remember sitting at my desk after a particularly demanding wedding consultation, feeling completely drained. The couple was lovely, the project was profitable, and by all external measures, my business was thriving. Yet I found myself dreading the next booking confirmation email. The realisation hit me like a weight in my chest: I was tired. Not just physically tired - soul tired. But admitting that felt like admitting failure, especially when everyone around me saw only success.” - Weiwei, from Chère Weddings to Wed&

This moment of reckoning comes for more wedding industry veterans than we care to admit. If you recognise yourself here, know it’s okay to question your relationship with your work. Feeling tired doesn’t make you weak. And it doesn’t mean all you’ve learned goes to waste.

Alongside my reflections, I spoke with Monica Saranya Selva De Roy, founder of HennaByMon, a Singapore-based henna artist collective established in 2016. Monica has been in the wedding industry for years, balancing creativity with the pressures of running a business. Her insights on burnout, boundaries, and finding energy in work illuminate the challenges many vendors face behind the scenes.

Featuring: Monica Saranya Selva De Roy | HennaByMon Contact: monicasaranya.s@gmail.com Established since 2016, HennabyMon is a team of henna artist based in Singapore.

The Burnout That’s Hard to Admit

Wedding industry burnout is different from what people feel in most regular jobs.

Monica on why wedding industry burnout is unique:

“You cannot experience a burnout just whenever you want and tap out to take a vacation, especially if you’re the business owner. You get booked 1.5-2 years in advance, and from the time you accept a deposit, unless it’s a bereavement leave, any other excuse - no matter how valid - has a possibility of being contested with.”

Burnout doesn’t follow your schedule. It often comes at the busiest time when you’re stressed.

Monica: “We are in the business of understanding excellent timeliness. We charge for the promise that things happen in the exact way, at the exact time they want it to, and we pay the price for it by devoting our time, mind and body to the task.”

For me, my team once had 4 to 5 full-time staff, worked with luxury budgets, and was recognised by Tatler. To everyone else, we were a success. Inside, I was struggling. The biggest sign was that every month I was stressed about making payroll and paying rent, even though we had enough income. Each new month started with pressure, not a fresh start, and this was not healthy.

Recognising the Warning Signs

Monica on her burnout warning signs:

“I’m up at 5.30AM every single morning, whether it’s a weekday or weekend. The unwillingness to get up or get ready for the day is a clear indicator that, currently, I don’t think there’s anything significant enough getting up for.”

Other warning signs can include:

• Ongoing headaches or body pain

• Not being happy about bookings you would once look forward to

• Worrying about money each month even when you earn enough

• Feeling like you aren’t good enough, even with awards

• Feeling relieved when an event is canceled

• Feeling exhausted from always being on call for clients

For me, teaching at the Institute of Certified Wedding Planners (ICWP) should have felt like validation. Instead, it triggered impostor syndrome - questioning whether I was truly qualified, even after years of work.

Understanding Your Energy

Wedding burnout usually doesn’t affect every part of your job in the same way. Look at your recent projects: What parts made you feel good? What parts left you tired?

Common things that drain energy:

• Solving the same problems again and again

• Managing stressed or anxious families

• Always being available for clients

• Pressure about money at month-end

• Wanting everything perfect on a tight schedule

Things that bring energy:

• Solving new creative challenges

• Seeing meaningful moments

• Working with a team

• Improving your skills

• Feeling appreciated by clients

Figuring out what energises you and what drains you helps you decide your next step. Perhaps you need to adjust your approach to your job or consider exploring a new path.